Thursday, April 21, 2011

NaPoWriMo #21: Terrible Moments

I mixed myself up.
I traded my ghost
for the love I hid
under the welcome
mat with the spare key.
I thought too hard
about fire, found
myself running around
in flames, begging
someone to spit on me,
put me out.  Even on
the airplane I wouldn't
look out the windows,
clenching so hard
on the armrests
I was the only one
left in the air.  Life
needed sorting out.
For someone to grab
my toy chest, dump it
on the floor.  For them
to group the desires
together, shove my
fears in plastic bags.
To teach action figures
to play together in one
world, to promised
stuffed dolls fun days
on my bed.  I'd swear
to sleep until playthings
became alive around me,
preparing paperwork
I forgot, calling a restaurant
to schedule an anniversary
dinner, giving my therapist
rundowns on anxieties
that slip out of my brain,
sand from an hourglass
that counts each terrible
moment as my own.

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